Technological Ineptitude

In case the blog title, tag line, and profile description didn't tip you off, I am a nerd. Or a geek. Or a dork.

Probably all three.

There are those out there who would quickly jump up and object at my casual interchanging of the three terms, insisting that each has their own unique definition. I really don't care. I'm a socially awkward scientist who is passionate about biology, medicine, comics, science fiction, and thinks that technology is amazing. I manage to fit, one way or another, into all three categories. (What would that be? A Noreek? A Geeorkerd? Deeord?)

Computers and associated technology, however, are a slight weakness. Not because I don't love them; I truly do. However, despite coming from three generations of scientists and engineers (including two grandfathers who were aeronautical engineers), my parents are technologically impaired. I don't know why, considering the scientific professions of their parents; Maybe technological affinity skips a generation, or maybe technological ineptitude is the result of some undiscovered chromosomal translocation. (Probably not)

Their technophobia resulted in me having no computer skills until college, where I then learned about the wonders of email, social networking, mp3s, and even some basic coding. I was left in awe of the technology's potential and hungry for more. My parents, however, didn't share my sentiment. They refused to buy a DVD player until 2005. Mom still had dial up until 2009. My dad didn't even have internet at home until 2006. They still own more VHS tapes than DVDs.

I love them dearly, and they are learning. But their technophobia still leads to some amusing situations, such as the time I tried explaining the iPhone.

Me: You see, it operates as so much more than a phone. It can serve as a translator, a map, a GPS system, an address book, a calandar, you can make to-do lists, play games, take photos, watch movies, even pull up an electronic boarding pass which can be scanned right at the airport."
Parent: "And it has internet?"
Me: "Yup! Everywhere you go! Most of the applications rely on the internet to function"
Parent: "But what if I am not at home or work? That's where my internet is."
Me: "The phone company provides the wireless. You could have internet wherever you go."
Parent: "Why?"
Me: "What?"
Parent: "Why would you want that? You have internet at home, and internet at work. Why would you want internet everywhere you go?"
Me: "I...I don't understand the question..."

* awkward silence *

The parental unit never got the iPhone, opting instead for a low end samsung, which "has a touch screen and can get internet too, so it's like an iPhone."

I love them dearly, and they are learning. In the past two years I've informed them of Stephen Hawking, the large hadron collider, the difference between facebook and email, the importance of texting, and how to use a flash drive.